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Mostly nonsense, occasionally stamping out microbiological inumeracy, making food safer, and making podcasts.

900 Following   773 Followers   6,846 Tweets

Join Twitter 8/18/08

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@johnroderick 🎶 the dream of the 80s is alive in Seattle 🎶
@johnroderick live long, and prosper, John.The only blue and gold that matter today. #TheDress http://t.co/ggA0WUJfXG
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerLeonard Nimoy dies at 83 http://t.co/99teLbASGZ
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The Apple Watch I’m buying and the app I’m shipping for it: http://t.co/LYONKmR54v
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@siracusa I think she wins.@thx1766 good luck!
Subscribe now to @johnroderick's Rendezvous podcast w/guest @insertfartnoise! https://t.co/sERPIFIjea Help Mike's mom http://t.co/x4tCRGfsPi
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerMacs don’t come with bloatware installed, right? http://t.co/KzazQFkcy3 http://t.co/QsnIZuPHyI
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The Dan Benjamin Hour 1 with @danbenjamin - http://t.co/lv97iJrLtG. I talk with Dan about germs in the third half of the show. #dbh@danbenjamin @thomzahler @injuryexpert thanks so much for letting me be a part of episode zero, for what is going to be an awesome show!Thanks to everybody who tuned in to make the first episode of DBH happen. @thomzahler @injuryexpert @bugcounter
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@danbenjamin so excited!The first episode of The Dan Benjamin Hour is recording live now - http://t.co/FsNTnEpwHt
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This bizarre Tasmanian museum has a poo machine and the remains of a Tasmanian bomber: http://t.co/pdtgdb0ylT http://t.co/uCeLBBMrHI
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@insane_irish Alas it will be in Portland, OR this summer. You would need to buy a day pass to the meeting https://t.co/oaQ6SAEbITShit barge full of long pigs today. But I have Roderick on the Line: 143: “Traffic Cones & Retirees” to comfort me. http://t.co/AU2SYYQhCx
@ShawnKing @danbenjamin @5by5 blame Canada.The Science of Anti-Vaccination: http://t.co/sCuQEW1bHO
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerSong Exploder: The Long Winters - The Commander Thinks Aloud. I cannot recommend this podcast highly enough. http://t.co/mcgfBPF04W@hotdogsladies Decided to hire that 43folders guy to speak at a conference.@danbenjamin I'd be delighted to be on a show, pending my availability. And I could probably find you a scary disease guy.@danbenjamin soccer dad.#FiftyShadesofGrey http://t.co/jyOffZpnus
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@lukei4655 you forgot to say "Erm... so" first.@mbbatz oh my god like old stuff is so stupid you know@mbbatz still, the actual ghostly sounds are cool, even if not relevant with today's technology.@mbbatz yeah.“@ThatEricAlper: All the ghostly sounds that are lost when you compress to mp3: http://t.co/1nV120hRsA” cc: @warrenellis@mbbatz let me know if you need pattern ideas. My wife is an expert. http://t.co/KpEAhwZL1H@mbbatz what makes you think I don't already know?
Oh shit, I missed Mardi Gras, again.
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@benjaminchapman ‘fruit and veg lockdown’ sounds dirty.Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.
Retweeted by Don Schaffner"Sorry I was late to work, my Apple Car updated overnight and now the left front wheel doesn't work and U2 are in the back seat."
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerI’m giving up for Lent.
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerAn emoji guide for PR people pitching me a story: Email 😀 Twitter 😕 LinkedIn 🙅 Facebook 😡 Instagram 😰 Snail mail 😵 Phone 😤 Phone + email 💀
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@wojsvenwoj I thought bugge was what all the cool kids were saying now…@ozjuliancox thank goodness ;) damn reporters.Really @ozjuliancox? http://t.co/i02g4nqoBU chlorine in tap water kills pathogens?@maiamajumder Very cool. I await your analysis ;)COMIC: My email is a monster http://t.co/jFym7dE5hb http://t.co/PwtIY2Msvr
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@thelancearthur [trys to get into fighting stance in drop-crotch pant, loses balance and face-plants]@maiamajumder I don’t follow. What insight do you get from the distribution?Calling @BetteridgesLawhttp://t.co/0ii2YiD5RxListen to podcasts at whatever speed you want. http://t.co/bO3O9K2NRg
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@danielpunkass is it galling disrespect, or is it just utter cluelessness?@blankbaby @siracusa great episode, btw. I just finished listening.@bugcounter Schiit & Schaffner has such a nice ring to it. Just thank me in the acknowledgments. I'll submit as Batz, Mann, & Robyn.
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@mbbatz so since this is your idea I'm assuming you want to be senior author, and I get stuck with the crappy middle spot.@bugcounter Schiit, et al. J Diarrhea Res 2015 1(1):1-12 (How hard is it to create an online journal? Does Squarespace have a template?)
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@TheOnion @mbbatz some day I'd like to co-author a paper with Jack Shit.“@TheOnion: In Focus: Study Finds Jack Shit http://t.co/OmXvBmShFH http://t.co/BhgCsA2wXD” #fbRandom Trek “Indiscretion” (DS9). @siracusa's first comment questions the hosts choice of "non-random". http://t.co/Io6xHq5owVCan Jon Stewart Be Replaced? http://t.co/Fq0nNFZimC
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Fear is a proven money maker ::: The Food Babe’s war on “chemicals” heats up again http://t.co/3EhU5jwPNu
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@benjaminchapman so much Pink Floyd.
Is truncating the Y-axis misleading? http://t.co/btkQu0XUuk http://t.co/2VgzmB3CTm
Retweeted by Don Schaffner“@NWS_MountHolly: Winter Storm Watches for the Delmarva, se PA, s/c NJ http://t.co/NtXWCxspFD” expressing uncertainty @benjaminchapman@butt_things fecal oral cross-contaminationAndroid car http://t.co/ZK5HX6JHIy
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@thurfjell @danbenjamin I think you are thinking of dickclickery.@butt_things that might hurt.@siracusa So I should buy physical media? Like an animal?Jersey City man hid large package of drugs in his buttocks, police say http://t.co/SG1vxjNWMi
Retweeted by Don Schaffner“@AcademicsSay: http://t.co/8qsERbfxYM” #fbnever enough coffee, always too much snow.
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@wojsvenwoj Oh. Baby. So. Hot. Not really.Via @80sNeilYoung: http://t.co/VjJ4Y1R2wu, will you be my valentines @barfblog and @benjaminchapman?Roses are red Violets are whatever Let's get shithammered And eat 12 pizzas together
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerREPORTER: Mr. President, what's your favorite Wu Tang album? OBAMA: What kind of question is -- [biden grabs podium] BIDEN: LIQUID SWORDS
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerRoses are red Violents are blue All my base Are belong to you. Happy V Day, Twitter.
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@benjaminchapman One of my favorite lyrics in rock: “people walking sideways pretending that they’re leaving ”That was fast. Images of the Apple car prototype have already leaked: http://t.co/DKep9LRnsA
Retweeted by Don Schaffner#recap Robert Smith’s Calendar http://t.co/Nnmj4mFcQc http://t.co/Y3VUqPKFu9
Retweeted by Don Schaffnerroses are red with jokes, i work blue fuck fuck fuck fuck go eat a poo
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@benjaminchapman you should teach him this one next http://t.co/TDjtII3jboUnauthorized immigrants pack 'undocuRutgers' college admissions fair amid heightened security http://t.co/eX8RYUCzA7
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerThe G train is green The A train is blue That car with no people Has both pee and poo. #subwayvalentines
Retweeted by Don Schaffner“@texburgher: Roses are red, Tulips are Dutch, I really don’t like this rhyme scheme so well.” #fb@inthefade"There would be no Cold War without World War Two" "Good heavens I don't even know where to start with that statement"
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@thx1766 https://t.co/FX4qNSkmFYSadly, my kids give up and beg me to stop explaining way before I reach the (very meager) limits of my knowledge. https://t.co/vCehIcqYP9
Retweeted by Don Schaffner“Like trying to… teach a lizard to cover a Foo Fighters song“@siracusa @danielpunkass can't we all agree on cheese? Cc: @johnroderick@mbbatz @barfblog government consultant.@thetalkshow @hotdogsladies I think this brings my total of Merlin listening this week to well over four hours!
Retweeted by Don Schaffner@nytimes @siracusa holy crap."If it was magnetically levitated, and you had no air resistance, you could go, conceivably, faster than light." #supertrain
Retweeted by Don Schaffner“@mbbatz: Nailed it: "Man’s Food Poisoning Could Realistically Be Traced Back To Any Meal From Past" Week http://t.co/HopKjbkxZJ” #fbDon Schaffner (@BugCounter) on the importance of washing one's hands http://t.co/yaEIsIlsyW @Rutgers
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@danbenjamin [sigh] those were the days.Remember when "DM'ing" was a D&D term?
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerICYMI http://t.co/P20MocCTTa
Retweeted by Don SchaffnerFood Safety Talk 72: It’s a cup that you fill full of poutine w/ Manan Sharma is up. @bugcounter missed out. https://t.co/eM7a89C0Je
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@GlennF @hotdogsladies @dlpasco 🎶 Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do
@danbenjamin 😢 Verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves.@TheAtlantic: Connecting your sheep to the Internet: How wi-fi can be used to monitor agricultural practices http://t.co/nnFiZ5xJ6w #fb
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